After exercising, energy balancing, invoicing, working, then cleaning, I begin to wait for the city inspector to arrive to check our AC installation. I am listening to audio books and watching videos, and particularly intrigued by videos of mediums John Edwards and Theresa Caputo. I used to watch Edwards’ TV show decades ago. You made fun of me for taking in such nonsense. And yet, it still holds my interest.
It is the rainy season. Warm tropical downpours come through regularly, including now. The thunder is booming as this storm pedals through. Grey light pours into the windows and the rain slows down. Ocean waves gently slap back and forth on TV, which is tuned to beach cam. I close my eyes and soften my fingers onto the keyboard to practice automatic writing. I’m not sure how to prove if this is voice of spirit, higher self, or imagination, but here it is:
Why are you doing this? You know I never believed in any of it. But yes. I am here. I was at graduation. With the AC inspector. Sitting next to you right now. Is this what you want to hear? I can order us a bottle of white wine (I see you sitting across from me at our favorite beachside restaurant). Here we are. The salad is better than the one you had at the snack bar, but I see you are trying your best. She appreciates you. The transition will be smooth. You are healthy now. It’s a good time to work with your hands. Pack some things up. Let some things go. Create space for new energy and easier transitions. Your water space is opening up to you this fall. Things are happening. Just remain aware. Don’t be discouraged by present reality. Close your eyes and go with the flow. I love you. We love you. All are one. We are one. One are all.
– The voice in my head