I’m thinking you would be proud of me, how much I’ve learned to do out of force. All that technical stuff you used to do for us, I’m doing that now, including moving web sites, setting up email accounts, changing the battery on smoke alarms, and cooking. I’m also budgeting and managing money. I have a tax accountant and a financial advisor to help me. I’m glad not to be freaking out anymore. However…
In December, I allowed panic to creep in. Impatient with the growth of my business and negative cash flow, I started making moves to get out of here. But, our kids wouldn’t have it and frankly, I’m not ready to kick the stool out from under me. I love our house, and need to be here a little while longer.
This year, I have so many ideas! I have a written plan. I am going to create, create, create and generate income from multiple streams, some active, some passive, all creative, and all activities that EXCITE me. I feel good about this. I just need to keep a positive mindset and work towards my goals at a steady pace.
It’s now 8:30 AM. I’ve been working for an hour already. Now talking to you, but sunlight is pouring through our front room windows, illuminating the piano. Come join me over there. We can sing and play for a bit.
I’ve seen some videos of people describing their near-death experiences. They all had the equivalent of a super joyous acid trip and became huge energy versions of themselves… still salient and aware… exploring the cosmos and connecting with others and oneness. This earthly existence is an illusion for learning & experiences. I feel some comfort knowing you leveled up. I’m not totally sure you’re still with me, but maybe it’s more complicated than that. So long as I am holding you in my thoughts, you are with me. Whether it’s the memory of you, or the continuation of you, I’m not sure. When I ask a question in my mind, your voice responds quickly and directly. Is that how this works? I love you.